Spouse & The Warning Siren of Annoyance

The way we have shit set up, Spouse gets the den, and I get the living room. His computer is in there, and he has some video game paraphernalia, and his tv. Lately, he's taken to watching Stargate Something Or Other in there, via Netflix.

As I sit out in the living room, I suddenly become aware of a constant beeping buzz sound. You know, like if you are on Spaceball 1, and being warned of impending Self Destruct. THAT kind of constant warning beep.



I ignored it for about 10 minutes, but it was getting aggressively annoying. Like stab myself in the ear annoying.Then it got even more annoying. And it just kept going. And I was all, WTH!

Spouse was like, What buzzing? Is it the fan? ..... WHAT BUZZING???? DEAR GOD, MAN! The exasperating buzzing from your completely abrading show!

He mocked me about death attacks, and what not, but that sound? I wanted it to just go away. About 20 minutes into the death of all Reason, he says this.

Spouse: You realize the buzzing ended like 15 minutes ago, right?

Me: ......

Me: Huh.

Me: Maybe it is the fan.

Me: Come here.

Spouse: Dude. It's the fan.


And it was. Our ceiling fan was wired by the morons who owned the house before us. They were very into uninformed do-it-yourself projects. Like making a big laundry room, but wiring it so that you have to have the washer and drying facing each other, so close to one another, that you can't open the dryer all the way. Like that.

The fan, for starters, has 3 lights attached. And it's on a dimmer switch. And if it's on full power? It's too much for the fan circuits, and the light bulbs. It puts off a dull hum that we really just ignore. However, the glass domes also come loose from time to time, and shake in the "socket" when the fan is on, creating a noticeable noise. Usually it isn't -that- loud.

Tonight? HOLY FUCKING CRAP! I wanted to tear my damn eyes out of their sockets, and stuff them in my ears to stop that damn noise!