And then, I took the drugs that killed Michael Jackson

Last week was my quarterly appointment with my Pain Clinic for the arthritis I have on my neck. It's SUPER fun, though I have described it before.

You know that scene in The Mummy where they talk about the process of mummification? You know, Evie tells them that they jam a red hot poker up their nose, scramble it about, then pull the brains out through the nose?

The few times I was "lucky" enough to be cognizant of my surroundings during the appointment, that's what it felt like. Only through the back of my skull, instead of my nose. After that, I have dealt with issues regarding sedation just about every time.

Here's the issues-

Trip 1- I was KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT for 12 hours, and groggy as all hell for another 12. I was actually unable to walk. For reals, I took a step forward, and couldn't figure out why I was moving backwards.

Trip 2- I asked to dial the good stuff back a notch. They did, and it worked fine. I was semi-out of it for about 3 hours, but not asleep. Good stuff.

Trip 3- Can't recall any issues, must have worked fine.

Trip 4- Told them it worked fine. Not sure if they changed it, but I was awake and felt shit that time.

Trip 5- Mentioned to them that I could feel it last time, and could they make that not happen again? They fucked with it. I was able to feel EVERY little jab, scramble, swirl, etc, that time. I was in tears.

Trip 6- Mentioned to them that I was in no way ever repeating the experience from the last time, and could they please never do that shit to me again? They added a 2nd sedation medication to the 1st, and knocked my ass out. I went from closing my eyes in 1 room, to opening them in the recovery room. I slept a decent amount, but wasn't out of it all day. LOVED it.

Trip 7 (that's this trip, ya'll)- Told them that last time's sedation was perfect. Got told that there's a shortage of Versed, and we'd be changing it to Phenobarbital. Then, got a loooooooooong ass explanation as to how it's the drug Michael Jackson took that wound up killing him. Explained that it was safe. I told them I was figuring it was, or they wouldn't be giving it to me. They hooked me up with oxygen for the first time, then shot the shit in. Holy fuck, ya'll, it was PERFECT. At first. I was out for the procedure, then woke up when they rolled me onto a gurney to bright fucking lights. TOld the doctor it worked great.

 Waiting for the doctor.

 This was in the office, after I changed and waiting to be taken back for the procedure. I ROCKED the duck face, grimace look so many teens do these days. NAILED it.

First post procedure photo. Couldn't keep my eyes open. Wasn't sure I even took the photo.

 

 Second post procedure photo. Not sure why I look so odd- I was half asleep still, but feeling nice and floaty.

 

 Last post procedure photo. Oxygen gone. No, that's not blood on my finger, it's betadine. No, I'm not actually throwing a peace sign- I was showing off my oxygen monitor. (in my head, I was completely baffled trying to just hold up 1 finger) It's safe to say I was feeling pretty fucking good.

I was actually awake the entire drive back to my dad's place (the office is in my home town, and I need to have a driver every time, so I have to find people willing to sacrifice a day for me), and my mind felt very lucid. I was a bit groggy, but didn't fall asleep on the way home.

Got to my Dad's place, and felt very queasy from the drive, which was new. Then I lost my lunch, which is also new. Felt fine afterwards, so Dad made me dinner. I was VERY slow in eating- like a small bite every 5 minutes, cause it made my belly just roll when I swallowed.

After about 30 minutes, I lost my dinner, too. Then, I slept for about 2 hours, woke up queasy, then went back to bed queasy. I did feel fine the next morning, though.

So, end results? Please stop the shortage of Versed, because Phenobarbital? While the floating feeling was nice, the losing my meals part? Not so much.